leslieism

I just did the dishes and I found myself laughing…to myself, as I recalled a recent article I read in Cosmo that suggested doing the dishes naked…to make it more fun!  Who does that?? That doesn’t even remotely sound fun and I like to think of myself as the type of person that does in fact like to have fun.

Instead of ripping my clothes off while doing the dishes, I thought about something that happened today and I feel the need to share.  Because that is what I do.  I get all personal sometimes and have certain people in my life get all embarrassed of and/or for me.  Why!?  I’m not embarrassed of anything I write…it’s me, it’s who I am and I am no different than anyone else….for the most part we are all one and the same.

My theory on shame is as such; if you are trying to better your life then you do not need to be ashamed of your past.  Even if the “past” is only like an hour ago.  If you learned from your mistake an hour ago and you are trying to better yourself or the situation presently, then do not be ashamed or embarrassed.  Sometimes we don’t learn the first time and we need to make the same mistake 2,3, maybe 15 more times….15 is my average.

An appropriate example for me to feel shame/embarrassment:  If I was a crackhead, perhaps living in a stranger’s fifth-wheel, possibly stealing their internet/cable connection…..because let’s be real, I’m a crackhead….I am up all night abusing Google and I got no money.

Now, once I begin to change my life and experience “the shift” (thank you, Dr. Wayne Dyer), I do not need to be ashamed of my old crackhead ways, instead rather, I choose to laugh about them and share my stories.

Getting back on point, today I was asked by a judge to hold up my right hand and swear to tell the truth.  As I said, “I do”, I was actually debating on if I would be completely honest; if I was confronted with a situation I am not proud to admit.  My heart was pounding at the thought of lying and I almost convinced myself that I could lie, even though it’s not my style.  I was willing to lie because I was embarrassed and ashamed of something I had done…..that is why many people lie.  The reason it is best to just fess up???  Lying gets confusing and in the end , the truth is always seen.

The truth is always SEEN….not heard.  Because of my actions, I felt okay with telling the truth, no matter how it may make me look…..my actions have my back.

I will never know for sure what would have happened in court today, as my “situation” was never even mentioned.  What did happen in court today though……I was able to hold my head high because the truth inside me knows that I have done everything I possibly can and I am only making decisions based upon the best interest of my daughter and myself.  The actions or lack thereof, of the other party …..well, the judge was not interested in hearing anything they had to SAY. They left with their head held high also(being a liar can give you a false sense of ego and entitlement)……and with a police escort…..due to their ACTIONS in court.

Nobody likes a liar…..nor do liars like themselves.  I will take note of this day and how I felt when I was contemplating telling a lie.  Thank you baby Jesus and Abe Lincoln for setting the bar on honesty.